Lunes, Disyembre 21, 2009
Miyerkules, Disyembre 16, 2009
Picture
My eldest daughter had been fond of taking pictures using camera phone.
With several camera phone at home, this are some of her works:
BTW she is just 4 years old.
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With several camera phone at home, this are some of her works:
BTW she is just 4 years old.
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Linggo, Disyembre 13, 2009
VALAKUT update
It seems that valakut does not want me.
I performs well on playtest, but on actual tournament, it fails. If it losses to manadrought, its manaflood without valakut.
Below is the latest revision I made with valakut. 2 - 2 on my last FNM, 1 -3 - 2 on the recently concluded Gold Rush. 0 - 9 on JUND matchups.
ATM i will be dropping this deck
13 mountains
4 valakut
4 forest
4 terramorphic expanse
25 land
4 bloodbraid elf
4 siege-gang commander
4 goblin ruinblaster
12 creatures
4 harrow
4 khalni heart expedition
3 rampant growth
3 expedition map
4 lightning bolt
2 burst lightning
3 lavaball trap
23 other spells
SB
4 demolish
2 trace of abundance
3 relic of prognetus
2 caldera hellion
1 valcanic fallout
1 pyroclasm
2 chandra nalaar
I performs well on playtest, but on actual tournament, it fails. If it losses to manadrought, its manaflood without valakut.
Below is the latest revision I made with valakut. 2 - 2 on my last FNM, 1 -3 - 2 on the recently concluded Gold Rush. 0 - 9 on JUND matchups.
ATM i will be dropping this deck
13 mountains
4 valakut
4 forest
4 terramorphic expanse
25 land
4 bloodbraid elf
4 siege-gang commander
4 goblin ruinblaster
12 creatures
4 harrow
4 khalni heart expedition
3 rampant growth
3 expedition map
4 lightning bolt
2 burst lightning
3 lavaball trap
23 other spells
SB
4 demolish
2 trace of abundance
3 relic of prognetus
2 caldera hellion
1 valcanic fallout
1 pyroclasm
2 chandra nalaar
Miyerkules, Disyembre 2, 2009
Sabado, Nobyembre 21, 2009
Valakut tourney report
I am not the best player out there, but I can see that this deck have the potential given a good pilot.
Valakut - tourney report (11192009)
Valakut - tourney report (11192009)
the deck
Valakut - tourney report (11192009)
Valakut - tourney report (11192009)
the deck
RG Valakut Control - the deck
13x mountains
3x forest
4x terramorphic expance
4x valakut
24 lands
4 harrow
4 rampant growth
4 expedition map
4 Khalni Heart Expedition
4 lightning bolt
4 burst lightning
4 lavaball trap
4volcanic fallout
2 chandra nalaar
2 fiery fall
36 spells
3x forest
4x terramorphic expance
4x valakut
24 lands
4 harrow
4 rampant growth
4 expedition map
4 Khalni Heart Expedition
4 lightning bolt
4 burst lightning
4 lavaball trap
4volcanic fallout
2 chandra nalaar
2 fiery fall
36 spells
Valakut - tourney report (11202009)
Tournament Report
Nov 20, 2009 (Friday) AlphaStrike Hobby Shop. Cavite Philippines
9 man tournament. 6th 2-2
the deck
Round 1: JUND
Game 1
Open again a one land hand, mulligan to 6. I have 3 lands on hand but hesitant because no green source, and 1 burst, 1 bolt, and a harrow, but still decided to play with it, I am on the play this time.
He got me blightning 2x, then played a broodmate, I managed to dropped a Chandra nalaar, to kill his broodmate, but on his turn dropped a bloodbraid cascaded a bolt, targeting Chandra, then swinging for the win.
Game 2
Open again a one hand land, mull again to 6. It seem like my deck is afraid of JUND.
My 6 hand is much better than the previous mulligan I had. I took it. He managed to ruin blaster me for 2 turns, which got me manascrewed to reach a 5 land play. When I went 5 lands its too late for me.
His damage on this game came from his own fetches, what a game.
0 – 2, 0 – 1 (0 – 4 against JUND)
Round 2: GW
1st game
He dropped River Boa, and then next turn dropped a sledge equipping his Boa. I managed to slow down the boa, but its regenerate ability is too much to get the Boa destroyed. I even managed to hard cast a lavaball trap but a boa with a green source is really bad for the removals I have.
2nd game
I manage to control the board with the removals I have on my hand. No Boa here so lucky me. Got my valakut online then just killed him with valakut.
3rd game
He manage to dropped a 2/2 protection from black creature, with a sledge on it. Tried to kill by lavaball trap it but he had dauntless to make it indestructible. On my turn top deck another lavaball trap killing his lone creature. Left with 2 lands on play I controlled the game till I killed him with harrow, harrow, and harrow combo.
2 – 1; 1 – 1
Round 3: Emeria gainer
Love this match up, learned many things here. I like this deck, ramping his plains with Knight of the White Orchid, and Kor Cartographer to make his emeria online at the same time gaining life through baneslayer, wall of reverence, Battlegrace Angel, Landbind Ritual, and Felidar Sovereign (another win-con). I mean this deck rocks.
Game 1
I managed to destroy him emeria through lavaball, but his creature’s keeps on coming. I had killed his baneslayer, wall of reverence, battlegrace, felidar, iona through my valakuts. But still he managed to get 2 emeria lands online. With 13 mountains and 11 on play I know I will not win this game.
Lessons here – always check your triggers (khalni).
Game 2
I have no answer to a banslayer.
0 – 2; 1 – 2
Round 4: White Winnie
Game 1
2 khalni, two forest, terramorphic, harrow and a lavaball trap but no valakut on hand.
On turn 3 of opponent turn EOT a harrow, activated the 2 khalni on play, sacrificing both getting 8 land on play. On my turn played the lavaball trap on my hand, controlling the game.
Game 2
Honor of the pure with baneslayer on play won him the game..
Game 3
He had played again an honor of the pure and a baneslayer, had it swing on 6th turn dealing me 6 damage, and him getting to 26 life. On the same turn he played a pledge giving him 6 soldiers, 5 tapped mana and 1 open mana (he must have brave the elements) I have 2 forest, 4 mountain, 1 valakut. On my hand was lavaball, burst, harrow, and a mountain. EOT on that same turn I played a harrow, sac forest, and getting 2 mountains dealing 6 damage to baneslayer, he then responded with brave the elements (and I was right) protecting his baneslayer (now his tapped out). On my turn drew a terramorphic, played the terramorphic, sac to get a mountain, 3 damage dealt to baneslayer then played my lavaball killing the baneslayer and the soldier tokens from the pledge.
On the following turns I manage to play 4 valakut. Then drew a harrow to deal 24 damage, then 2 burst lightning for the win.
2 – 1; 2 – 2
Placed 6th on a 9 man tournament, 1st was JUND
Entrance fee is 100php, don’t really know the price structure. 8k tourney.
If you would want to really learn competitive play, then this is the venue for you.
Learned a lot on this venue, and still learning more. Tournament location to be posted later.
Nov 20, 2009 (Friday) AlphaStrike Hobby Shop. Cavite Philippines
9 man tournament. 6th 2-2
the deck
Round 1: JUND
Game 1
Open again a one land hand, mulligan to 6. I have 3 lands on hand but hesitant because no green source, and 1 burst, 1 bolt, and a harrow, but still decided to play with it, I am on the play this time.
He got me blightning 2x, then played a broodmate, I managed to dropped a Chandra nalaar, to kill his broodmate, but on his turn dropped a bloodbraid cascaded a bolt, targeting Chandra, then swinging for the win.
Game 2
Open again a one hand land, mull again to 6. It seem like my deck is afraid of JUND.
My 6 hand is much better than the previous mulligan I had. I took it. He managed to ruin blaster me for 2 turns, which got me manascrewed to reach a 5 land play. When I went 5 lands its too late for me.
His damage on this game came from his own fetches, what a game.
0 – 2, 0 – 1 (0 – 4 against JUND)
Round 2: GW
1st game
He dropped River Boa, and then next turn dropped a sledge equipping his Boa. I managed to slow down the boa, but its regenerate ability is too much to get the Boa destroyed. I even managed to hard cast a lavaball trap but a boa with a green source is really bad for the removals I have.
2nd game
I manage to control the board with the removals I have on my hand. No Boa here so lucky me. Got my valakut online then just killed him with valakut.
3rd game
He manage to dropped a 2/2 protection from black creature, with a sledge on it. Tried to kill by lavaball trap it but he had dauntless to make it indestructible. On my turn top deck another lavaball trap killing his lone creature. Left with 2 lands on play I controlled the game till I killed him with harrow, harrow, and harrow combo.
2 – 1; 1 – 1
Round 3: Emeria gainer
Love this match up, learned many things here. I like this deck, ramping his plains with Knight of the White Orchid, and Kor Cartographer to make his emeria online at the same time gaining life through baneslayer, wall of reverence, Battlegrace Angel, Landbind Ritual, and Felidar Sovereign (another win-con). I mean this deck rocks.
Game 1
I managed to destroy him emeria through lavaball, but his creature’s keeps on coming. I had killed his baneslayer, wall of reverence, battlegrace, felidar, iona through my valakuts. But still he managed to get 2 emeria lands online. With 13 mountains and 11 on play I know I will not win this game.
Lessons here – always check your triggers (khalni).
Game 2
I have no answer to a banslayer.
0 – 2; 1 – 2
Round 4: White Winnie
Game 1
2 khalni, two forest, terramorphic, harrow and a lavaball trap but no valakut on hand.
On turn 3 of opponent turn EOT a harrow, activated the 2 khalni on play, sacrificing both getting 8 land on play. On my turn played the lavaball trap on my hand, controlling the game.
Game 2
Honor of the pure with baneslayer on play won him the game..
Game 3
He had played again an honor of the pure and a baneslayer, had it swing on 6th turn dealing me 6 damage, and him getting to 26 life. On the same turn he played a pledge giving him 6 soldiers, 5 tapped mana and 1 open mana (he must have brave the elements) I have 2 forest, 4 mountain, 1 valakut. On my hand was lavaball, burst, harrow, and a mountain. EOT on that same turn I played a harrow, sac forest, and getting 2 mountains dealing 6 damage to baneslayer, he then responded with brave the elements (and I was right) protecting his baneslayer (now his tapped out). On my turn drew a terramorphic, played the terramorphic, sac to get a mountain, 3 damage dealt to baneslayer then played my lavaball killing the baneslayer and the soldier tokens from the pledge.
On the following turns I manage to play 4 valakut. Then drew a harrow to deal 24 damage, then 2 burst lightning for the win.
2 – 1; 2 – 2
Placed 6th on a 9 man tournament, 1st was JUND
Entrance fee is 100php, don’t really know the price structure. 8k tourney.
If you would want to really learn competitive play, then this is the venue for you.
Learned a lot on this venue, and still learning more. Tournament location to be posted later.
Valakut - tourney report (11192009)
Tournament report
Nov 19, 2009 (Thursday) Gamers' Lounge QC Phil.
12 man tournament. 6th 2-2
the deck
Round 1: JUND
My first game was JUND.
1st game
I lost the dice, so I’m on the draw. Opened a one land hand, I mulled to 6 cards. Still opened a one land hand, but I had 3 bolts plus one expedition map. Hoping to draw another land, I kept it. I had bolted most of his putrid leech (he dropped 3 copies), but my land count did not increased to 3. And he already had Garruk and a Brodmate Dragon in play. I lost to Garruks Overrun effect plus unreachable Brodmate Dragon by my removals (volcanic fallout).
2nd game
I am on the play; I got a good opening, harrow, valakut, lavaball trap.
On the other hand he had duress, removed my harrow. Even though he got my harrow, I still manage to have 8 lands on the play ready to cast my lavaballl trap (8th land through rampant growth – this is on my 5th turn), then by luck he drew his needed land for a kicked goblin ruinblaster, taking me back to 7 lands on play, then another ruinblaster, then another. Played a Chandra buts its too late, got more damage than I can afford.
0 – 2; 0 – 1
Round 2: JUND (again)
1st game
Im on the play, opened again a one hand land, mulled to 6, again another one land hand. Decided to play it because, again of 3 bolt and 1 burst, hoping to have enough removal for me to establish my lands. I just scooped because the 2nd land never came, and already down to 9.
2nd game
Again another one land hand, I have 24 land BTW. Mulled down to 5, on the 5th mulligan I had 4 mountains, one expedition map, decided to play it. Got my valakut online early but ruinblaster destroyed it through bloodbraid. Blighning my 3x. Rest is history.
0 – 2; 0 – 2, BTW (this will be my 0 – 3 against JUND)
Round 3: RDW
This was a race.
1st game
He got had me down to 5, but I had a khalni, 2 valakut, 4 mountains on the play, then one harrow on my hand. Play harrow, sac forest, activate khalni. Do the math.
2nd game
2 khalni, 2 valakut in play. Need to say more?
2 – 0; 1 – 2
Round 4: BOROS
This was also a race
1st game
He had me down to 6, but lost gas, due to me removals. Got my valakut online, then sit and wait for my mountains to finish the game. He was hoping for at least a bolt or harms way but didn’t came. Lucky me
2nd game
Turn 1 land
Turn 2 valakut
Turn 3 kahlni, then land
Turn 4 harrow, khalni active.
Turn 5 khalni,
Turn 6 harrow, harrow, khalni, khalni, for the win.
2 – 0; 2 – 2
Placed 6th on a 12 man tournament, 1st to 3rd was JUND.
On that tournament there was another one using the RG valakut combo deck, but he runs fog, bloodbraid, and some other creatures.
Entrance is 100php, 2 – 1 – 1 – 1 was the price structure, with one pack opened to be picked by the remaining players, with 5th placer picking first then 6th place picking second (me), then all picking one after another until all cards are picked. I got the green trap card that produces tokens when a noncreature permanent is destroyed, and a Demolish.
Fairview community still runs the best tournament out there. Tournament location will be posted later.
Nov 19, 2009 (Thursday) Gamers' Lounge QC Phil.
12 man tournament. 6th 2-2
the deck
Round 1: JUND
My first game was JUND.
1st game
I lost the dice, so I’m on the draw. Opened a one land hand, I mulled to 6 cards. Still opened a one land hand, but I had 3 bolts plus one expedition map. Hoping to draw another land, I kept it. I had bolted most of his putrid leech (he dropped 3 copies), but my land count did not increased to 3. And he already had Garruk and a Brodmate Dragon in play. I lost to Garruks Overrun effect plus unreachable Brodmate Dragon by my removals (volcanic fallout).
2nd game
I am on the play; I got a good opening, harrow, valakut, lavaball trap.
On the other hand he had duress, removed my harrow. Even though he got my harrow, I still manage to have 8 lands on the play ready to cast my lavaballl trap (8th land through rampant growth – this is on my 5th turn), then by luck he drew his needed land for a kicked goblin ruinblaster, taking me back to 7 lands on play, then another ruinblaster, then another. Played a Chandra buts its too late, got more damage than I can afford.
0 – 2; 0 – 1
Round 2: JUND (again)
1st game
Im on the play, opened again a one hand land, mulled to 6, again another one land hand. Decided to play it because, again of 3 bolt and 1 burst, hoping to have enough removal for me to establish my lands. I just scooped because the 2nd land never came, and already down to 9.
2nd game
Again another one land hand, I have 24 land BTW. Mulled down to 5, on the 5th mulligan I had 4 mountains, one expedition map, decided to play it. Got my valakut online early but ruinblaster destroyed it through bloodbraid. Blighning my 3x. Rest is history.
0 – 2; 0 – 2, BTW (this will be my 0 – 3 against JUND)
Round 3: RDW
This was a race.
1st game
He got had me down to 5, but I had a khalni, 2 valakut, 4 mountains on the play, then one harrow on my hand. Play harrow, sac forest, activate khalni. Do the math.
2nd game
2 khalni, 2 valakut in play. Need to say more?
2 – 0; 1 – 2
Round 4: BOROS
This was also a race
1st game
He had me down to 6, but lost gas, due to me removals. Got my valakut online, then sit and wait for my mountains to finish the game. He was hoping for at least a bolt or harms way but didn’t came. Lucky me
2nd game
Turn 1 land
Turn 2 valakut
Turn 3 kahlni, then land
Turn 4 harrow, khalni active.
Turn 5 khalni,
Turn 6 harrow, harrow, khalni, khalni, for the win.
2 – 0; 2 – 2
Placed 6th on a 12 man tournament, 1st to 3rd was JUND.
On that tournament there was another one using the RG valakut combo deck, but he runs fog, bloodbraid, and some other creatures.
Entrance is 100php, 2 – 1 – 1 – 1 was the price structure, with one pack opened to be picked by the remaining players, with 5th placer picking first then 6th place picking second (me), then all picking one after another until all cards are picked. I got the green trap card that produces tokens when a noncreature permanent is destroyed, and a Demolish.
Fairview community still runs the best tournament out there. Tournament location will be posted later.
Sabado, Nobyembre 14, 2009
(share) Joke time - laugh trip
taken from NGboards
on out off-topic section. galing kay allisonlim
yung YAYA sa baba galing sa email.
tawa ako ng tawa habang binabasa to. share ko lang
Host : Saan ang dream vacation mo?
Girl Contestant : Amangpulo.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What's your ideal age for marriage?
Girl : Uhm, uhm, I am not sure....
Host : Hindi, kunwari ikaw, more or less.
Girl : Uhmm... more. (Crowd booing... ) Sige, Sige. Less, less....
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : If you had a foreigner friend, where will you bring him to showcase the beauty of the Philippines?
Girl Contestant : Bocaue.
Host : Bocaue. Why Bocaue? There are so many places in the Philippines ? Why Bocaue?
Girl : Because it's a magnificent place.
Host : Which part of Bocaue?
Girl : The Bocaue Rice Terraces. (Banawe Kaya Yon!!)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The contestant, presenting herself, talks into the mic and says, "Hi! I'm Cristine Reyes from Bagiuo...," and then she turns around, walks a little, goes back then yells at the top of her lungs! Then shouts, "CITYYYYYYYY!!!!"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(From Little Miss Philippines)
Host : Anong gusto mo pag-laki mo?
Girl : Maging lalaki po!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : Who's your favorite author?
Contestant : Danielle Steele
Host : Why Danielle Steele?
Contestant : Because, because...Danielle Steele, I like best.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : How would you like me to address you?
Contestant : My address is Project 8, Quezon City.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What is your best feature?
Contestant : My graduation feature.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : So tell us, why did join this contest?
Contestant : Me, join this contest, why did I. Thank you!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What do you want to be after you graduate?
Contestant : I want to be a successful Medicine.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : Hindi ito boob, hindi ito tube. Pero tinatawag itong boobtube. Ano ito?
Contestant : BRA!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What is you favorite motto?
Contestant : If others can't why, why can't I!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What would you like to say to foreigners?
Contestant : Please come back.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(From gay beauty contest)
Host : What is the one thing that symbolizes happiness for you?
Gay contestant : (Stops, thinks and then smiles.) EGGPLANT PO!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What is your typical day?
Contestant : I think Saturday po!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(From gay contest)
Host : Ano ang advantage mo sa ibang contestant?
Gay Contestant : I think and believe na bilang isang bading......ano nga po ulit yung question?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : Which part of your body is your best asset?
Contestant : (Believe it or not she answered) Si Melanie Marquez po!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What is your favorite motto?
Contestant : (After a long pause) I don't have a motto eh. (So the crowd starts helping her out. The crowd starts saying "Time is gold! Time is gold!")
Contestant : I have na po. Chinese gold!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : If you were to describe the color blue to a blind person, how would you do it?"
Contestant : That's a very good question. Keep it up. (Then the girl turns and walks away.)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : So, you're vegetarian, what is your favorite vegetable?
Contestant : I like potatoes, tomatoes, beans and what's that? KALABASH?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What is your motto?
Contestant : Actor! (Everyone starts laughing.) Aay, actress pala.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : Who is your favorite fictional character?
Girl : JOSE RIZAL! (Crowd starts laughing.)
Host : Who is your favorite hero then?
Girl : Hulk Hogan.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : If you were to become a superhero, what would your power be?
Girl Contestant : Uhmm... a bumble bee!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What is your edge over the other contestants?
Girl Contestant : My edge.... 23 years old.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What, in your opinion, is the ideal age for marriage?
Girl : Between 24 and 25!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : How do you see yourself 10 years from now?
Girl : I'll be 28.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : Describe your love one in three words.
Girl : Kahit nga po 1 word, kaya ko.
Host : OK, sige!
Girl : In one word, MY LIFE!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : If you were given any special power, what would it be?
Girl : Power of Attorney!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : So you like reading, who's your favorite author?
Girl : Uhmm, Shakespeare.
Host : What works of Shakespeare?
Girl : Hindi ko po alam eh.
Host : But he's your favorite.
Girl : Eh kasi patay na sya eh.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What is the biggest problem facing the youth today?
Girl : Drugs.
Host : Why?
Girl : Mahal eh!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What is the essence of being gay?
Contestant : I'm proud to be gay because what is naked is essential to the eye!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What makes you blush?
Girl : Blush on!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : Hey, I heard you almost didn't make it, how did you get here? Did you ride or did you walk?
Gay Contestant : Of course, did you ride. What do you think of me, did you walk?
_______________________________________________
Kid: “Yaya look, boats!”
Yaya: “Dows are not boats, they’re yachts.”
Kid: “Yaya, spell yachts?”
Yaya: “Yor rayt, dey are boats.”
Woman carrying sick baby enters doctor’s office.
Doc: “Bottlefed?”
Woman: “Breastfed po.” (Doctors squeezes woman’s breasts repeatedly)
Doc: “Ayan ang problema, wala kang gatas, eh.”
Woman: “Yaya lang po ako doc!”
Inutusan si yaya na bumili ng dyaryo ( inquirer at phil. Star). Pagbalik sabi nya: : “Ma’am, wala pong Inquirer kaya bumili nalang po ako ng dalawang Star!”
Yaya: “Huhuhu…”
Ate: “O, bakit ka umiiyak?”
Yaya: “Kasi ate ang dami kong pimples!”
Ate: “Eh bakit ka ba tinitighiyawat?”
Yaya: “Kasi po di ako makatulog sa gabi.”
Ate: “O, bakit ka di makatulog?”
Yaya: “Kasi po may pinoproblema ako…”
Ate: “Ano naman ang pinoproblema mo?”
Yaya: “Kasi ate ang dami kong pimples!”
(Earlier) Mom: “Yaya, lagay mo yung pesto sa ref!”
(Later) Son: “Yaya, nakita mo PS2 ko?”
Yaya: “Nasa ref, pinalagay ng mama mo!”
yaya, nabutas ang uniform na pinaplantsa. Tanong ng amo: “Paano mo naman nasunog to?”
Yaya: “Secret!”
nanood ng movie…..“Ang pangit naman, happy ending!”
Sir: “Yaya, gawa mo ko ng kape. Yung decaf ha!”
Yaya: “Siyempre naman, alangan namang de-baso!”
yaya sa sari-sari store: “Miss isang Coke in can at isang Sprite na Coke in can…”
SIR: “Inday, si sir mo to, nabangga kotse ko & I need cash!”
INDAY: “Aru, dugo-dugo gang ka no?”
SIR: “Gaga! Si sir mo talaga to!”
INDAY: “Gago ka rin! Si sir ang tawag sa kin…kapkeyk…”
Ate: “O yaya, bakit ka umiiyak?”
Yaya: “Ati, sabi kasi ng duktor, tatanggalan ako ng butlig!”
Ate: “Eh yun lang pala eh! Bakit ka umiiyak?”
Yaya: “Buti kung one lig lang, eh kung butlig, wala na kong ligs!”
sa school, tinanong ng teacher c jenjen….: “The Earth is the 3rd planet from the sun. Ano ang katabi ng Mercury?”
biglang singit si yaya: “Parang Watson’s yata…”
Sir: “Yaya, natanggal mo yung mantsa sa barong ko?”
Yaya: “Opo! Tanggal na tanggal!”
Sir: “Good! Anong pinang-tanggal mo?”
Yaya: “Gunting!”
Yaya to tricycle driver: “Magkano sa City Hall?”
Driver: “Ikaw lang?”
Yaya: “Ay bakit, hindi ka sasama?”
(Si Kuya pumasok sa kuwarto ni Yaya) Kuya: “Yaya…”
Yaya: “Koya, wag po! Wag Pooooo!”
Kuya: “Gaga! Uutusan lang kita!”
Yaya: “Si Koya naman…nagsa-suggest lang…”
Kid: “Yaya, spell orange?”
Yaya: “Depende. Yung kulay o yung prutas?”
Midget Yaya who was newly hired: “Suwerte po kayo, ako ang napili niyo.
At least kung maibagsak ko si baby, mababa lang!”
matapos pagalitan dahil sa pinangako….. “Ma’am, hindi na po ako mangangako ulit…promise!”
yaya sa mcdo
Crew: “Dito niyo na po ba kakainin?”
Yaya: “Puwede sa table?”
AMO: “Bakit namatay ang aso?”
MAID: “Pinaliguan ko po ng laundry soap.”
AMO: “Nakamamatay ba yun?”
MAID: “Ewan ko nga po eh, pag-off ko ng washing machine patay na.”
on out off-topic section. galing kay allisonlim
yung YAYA sa baba galing sa email.
tawa ako ng tawa habang binabasa to. share ko lang
Host : Saan ang dream vacation mo?
Girl Contestant : Amangpulo.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What's your ideal age for marriage?
Girl : Uhm, uhm, I am not sure....
Host : Hindi, kunwari ikaw, more or less.
Girl : Uhmm... more. (Crowd booing... ) Sige, Sige. Less, less....
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : If you had a foreigner friend, where will you bring him to showcase the beauty of the Philippines?
Girl Contestant : Bocaue.
Host : Bocaue. Why Bocaue? There are so many places in the Philippines ? Why Bocaue?
Girl : Because it's a magnificent place.
Host : Which part of Bocaue?
Girl : The Bocaue Rice Terraces. (Banawe Kaya Yon!!)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The contestant, presenting herself, talks into the mic and says, "Hi! I'm Cristine Reyes from Bagiuo...," and then she turns around, walks a little, goes back then yells at the top of her lungs! Then shouts, "CITYYYYYYYY!!!!"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(From Little Miss Philippines)
Host : Anong gusto mo pag-laki mo?
Girl : Maging lalaki po!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : Who's your favorite author?
Contestant : Danielle Steele
Host : Why Danielle Steele?
Contestant : Because, because...Danielle Steele, I like best.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : How would you like me to address you?
Contestant : My address is Project 8, Quezon City.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What is your best feature?
Contestant : My graduation feature.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : So tell us, why did join this contest?
Contestant : Me, join this contest, why did I. Thank you!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What do you want to be after you graduate?
Contestant : I want to be a successful Medicine.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : Hindi ito boob, hindi ito tube. Pero tinatawag itong boobtube. Ano ito?
Contestant : BRA!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What is you favorite motto?
Contestant : If others can't why, why can't I!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What would you like to say to foreigners?
Contestant : Please come back.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(From gay beauty contest)
Host : What is the one thing that symbolizes happiness for you?
Gay contestant : (Stops, thinks and then smiles.) EGGPLANT PO!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What is your typical day?
Contestant : I think Saturday po!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(From gay contest)
Host : Ano ang advantage mo sa ibang contestant?
Gay Contestant : I think and believe na bilang isang bading......ano nga po ulit yung question?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : Which part of your body is your best asset?
Contestant : (Believe it or not she answered) Si Melanie Marquez po!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What is your favorite motto?
Contestant : (After a long pause) I don't have a motto eh. (So the crowd starts helping her out. The crowd starts saying "Time is gold! Time is gold!")
Contestant : I have na po. Chinese gold!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : If you were to describe the color blue to a blind person, how would you do it?"
Contestant : That's a very good question. Keep it up. (Then the girl turns and walks away.)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : So, you're vegetarian, what is your favorite vegetable?
Contestant : I like potatoes, tomatoes, beans and what's that? KALABASH?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What is your motto?
Contestant : Actor! (Everyone starts laughing.) Aay, actress pala.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : Who is your favorite fictional character?
Girl : JOSE RIZAL! (Crowd starts laughing.)
Host : Who is your favorite hero then?
Girl : Hulk Hogan.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : If you were to become a superhero, what would your power be?
Girl Contestant : Uhmm... a bumble bee!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What is your edge over the other contestants?
Girl Contestant : My edge.... 23 years old.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What, in your opinion, is the ideal age for marriage?
Girl : Between 24 and 25!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : How do you see yourself 10 years from now?
Girl : I'll be 28.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : Describe your love one in three words.
Girl : Kahit nga po 1 word, kaya ko.
Host : OK, sige!
Girl : In one word, MY LIFE!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : If you were given any special power, what would it be?
Girl : Power of Attorney!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : So you like reading, who's your favorite author?
Girl : Uhmm, Shakespeare.
Host : What works of Shakespeare?
Girl : Hindi ko po alam eh.
Host : But he's your favorite.
Girl : Eh kasi patay na sya eh.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What is the biggest problem facing the youth today?
Girl : Drugs.
Host : Why?
Girl : Mahal eh!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What is the essence of being gay?
Contestant : I'm proud to be gay because what is naked is essential to the eye!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : What makes you blush?
Girl : Blush on!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Host : Hey, I heard you almost didn't make it, how did you get here? Did you ride or did you walk?
Gay Contestant : Of course, did you ride. What do you think of me, did you walk?
_______________________________________________
Kid: “Yaya look, boats!”
Yaya: “Dows are not boats, they’re yachts.”
Kid: “Yaya, spell yachts?”
Yaya: “Yor rayt, dey are boats.”
Woman carrying sick baby enters doctor’s office.
Doc: “Bottlefed?”
Woman: “Breastfed po.” (Doctors squeezes woman’s breasts repeatedly)
Doc: “Ayan ang problema, wala kang gatas, eh.”
Woman: “Yaya lang po ako doc!”
Inutusan si yaya na bumili ng dyaryo ( inquirer at phil. Star). Pagbalik sabi nya: : “Ma’am, wala pong Inquirer kaya bumili nalang po ako ng dalawang Star!”
Yaya: “Huhuhu…”
Ate: “O, bakit ka umiiyak?”
Yaya: “Kasi ate ang dami kong pimples!”
Ate: “Eh bakit ka ba tinitighiyawat?”
Yaya: “Kasi po di ako makatulog sa gabi.”
Ate: “O, bakit ka di makatulog?”
Yaya: “Kasi po may pinoproblema ako…”
Ate: “Ano naman ang pinoproblema mo?”
Yaya: “Kasi ate ang dami kong pimples!”
(Earlier) Mom: “Yaya, lagay mo yung pesto sa ref!”
(Later) Son: “Yaya, nakita mo PS2 ko?”
Yaya: “Nasa ref, pinalagay ng mama mo!”
yaya, nabutas ang uniform na pinaplantsa. Tanong ng amo: “Paano mo naman nasunog to?”
Yaya: “Secret!”
nanood ng movie…..“Ang pangit naman, happy ending!”
Sir: “Yaya, gawa mo ko ng kape. Yung decaf ha!”
Yaya: “Siyempre naman, alangan namang de-baso!”
yaya sa sari-sari store: “Miss isang Coke in can at isang Sprite na Coke in can…”
SIR: “Inday, si sir mo to, nabangga kotse ko & I need cash!”
INDAY: “Aru, dugo-dugo gang ka no?”
SIR: “Gaga! Si sir mo talaga to!”
INDAY: “Gago ka rin! Si sir ang tawag sa kin…kapkeyk…”
Ate: “O yaya, bakit ka umiiyak?”
Yaya: “Ati, sabi kasi ng duktor, tatanggalan ako ng butlig!”
Ate: “Eh yun lang pala eh! Bakit ka umiiyak?”
Yaya: “Buti kung one lig lang, eh kung butlig, wala na kong ligs!”
sa school, tinanong ng teacher c jenjen….: “The Earth is the 3rd planet from the sun. Ano ang katabi ng Mercury?”
biglang singit si yaya: “Parang Watson’s yata…”
Sir: “Yaya, natanggal mo yung mantsa sa barong ko?”
Yaya: “Opo! Tanggal na tanggal!”
Sir: “Good! Anong pinang-tanggal mo?”
Yaya: “Gunting!”
Yaya to tricycle driver: “Magkano sa City Hall?”
Driver: “Ikaw lang?”
Yaya: “Ay bakit, hindi ka sasama?”
(Si Kuya pumasok sa kuwarto ni Yaya) Kuya: “Yaya…”
Yaya: “Koya, wag po! Wag Pooooo!”
Kuya: “Gaga! Uutusan lang kita!”
Yaya: “Si Koya naman…nagsa-suggest lang…”
Kid: “Yaya, spell orange?”
Yaya: “Depende. Yung kulay o yung prutas?”
Midget Yaya who was newly hired: “Suwerte po kayo, ako ang napili niyo.
At least kung maibagsak ko si baby, mababa lang!”
matapos pagalitan dahil sa pinangako….. “Ma’am, hindi na po ako mangangako ulit…promise!”
yaya sa mcdo
Crew: “Dito niyo na po ba kakainin?”
Yaya: “Puwede sa table?”
AMO: “Bakit namatay ang aso?”
MAID: “Pinaliguan ko po ng laundry soap.”
AMO: “Nakamamatay ba yun?”
MAID: “Ewan ko nga po eh, pag-off ko ng washing machine patay na.”
Lunes, Nobyembre 9, 2009
WTF - 2 years have already passed
While I have been checking my blog posts, I noticed that some of my post has no source, I mean most of my blogs are taken from email, sharing it to the community, but I have forgotten to include that it came from somebody else, sent to me through email.
Now to correct this, I have put on all of those posts - “taken from an email”. Those were really not mine, but rather I was just sharing some nice read. And if you would take the time to browse those posts, you would agree to me that those are indeed nice reads. And for the author of those posts, I don’t really know, ‘coz they were just forwarded to me through emails.
Now while going through the first entry of my posts, I noticed it dated - 8/19/07.
WTF August 19, 2007 – that’s like 2 years ago already.
And my first post was:
“naiingit lang kaya gumawa din ako ng blog..
just got jealous of blogs, that made one myself.
anyways this is my first ever blog
anyways if need to talk to me, do add me at YM
my id is david.macas”
Talk of nostalgia.
This would also mean that I am already 2 yrs on my current job as an Equipment Engineer.
WHAT THE HELL I DID 2 YRS?!
It is very nice knowing what you did for the last 2 years, tracking yourself with a blog.
And with this I would like to thank whoever invented blogging, and of course who ever invented the internet. Internet got me 2 weeks of work suspension, but also at the same time gets me this job.
Really if I would evaluate it very carefully, I could say that GOD (the creator of heaven and earth, and everything else) works on mysterious ways. And he is really GOOD or I must say GREAT, no I think there is no word that could describe it.
Now to correct this, I have put on all of those posts - “taken from an email”. Those were really not mine, but rather I was just sharing some nice read. And if you would take the time to browse those posts, you would agree to me that those are indeed nice reads. And for the author of those posts, I don’t really know, ‘coz they were just forwarded to me through emails.
Now while going through the first entry of my posts, I noticed it dated - 8/19/07.
WTF August 19, 2007 – that’s like 2 years ago already.
And my first post was:
“naiingit lang kaya gumawa din ako ng blog..
just got jealous of blogs, that made one myself.
anyways this is my first ever blog
anyways if need to talk to me, do add me at YM
my id is david.macas”
Talk of nostalgia.
This would also mean that I am already 2 yrs on my current job as an Equipment Engineer.
WHAT THE HELL I DID 2 YRS?!
It is very nice knowing what you did for the last 2 years, tracking yourself with a blog.
And with this I would like to thank whoever invented blogging, and of course who ever invented the internet. Internet got me 2 weeks of work suspension, but also at the same time gets me this job.
Really if I would evaluate it very carefully, I could say that GOD (the creator of heaven and earth, and everything else) works on mysterious ways. And he is really GOOD or I must say GREAT, no I think there is no word that could describe it.
ARE you HAPPY?
Now that’s a question.
Are you happy?
Are you?
I just watched the movie “Shortcut to Happiness”, not that great movie, but the moral in it is great. The movie would tell you that getting happiness has many forms; you may be successful but not happy, paid high but not happy, the king but still not happy.
In my opinion happiness is contentment in life.
Some people are not content with the pay they get, the reason why they try to look for greener pasture. Which is mostly (for Filipino) located in other countries. Middle East may be dry, but sure the pasture there is very much green.
But still I have seen people still not happy with what they have even though are already earning so much. 3 storey house, 41 inch plasma TV, complete home theater, top of the line desktop computer, and yet not happy of what they have. It is because they are not content of what they have, they want more.
Me, I’m happy eating 3 times a day, playing with my children, being able to play Magic the Gathering from time to time (with my consent of course). I’m ok with that. I’m already content with that.
Have you ever been to Tondo, or the Payatas? People there are starving. They eat only once a day, every children works. But there are still happy, not pretty much of a complain. I’ve been there, so I would know.
Happiness is how content you are right now. - dmax
Sabado, Nobyembre 7, 2009
Valakut Control - tourney report
premise: i'm a full time dad. so no play test prior to toruney.
i play once a month, depends on my wife.
the deck should be better if i'm not the pilot.
13x mountains
3x forest
4x terramorphic expance
4x valakut
24 lands
4 harrow
4 rampant growth
4 expedition map
4 Khalni Heart Expedition
4 lightning bolt
4 burst lightning
3 lavaball trap
3 volcanic fallout
2 chandra nalaar
2 pyroclasm
2earthquake
36 spells
i played this deck last wednesday on philcoa, and it ran fine. it was a deck they did not expect.
round 1 was against vamps.
he took game 1, he got 3 bloodghast on the board. i manage to sweep it but, alas a land dropped. GG for me.
2nd game, i got an early online valakut, with khalni and few more mountains, he lost this game.
3rd game, i got an early valakut, but he manages to mindsludge me, and finished me with his malakir.
1-2, 0-1
round 2 was a control deck.
he just was not ready for my deck, i think the suprise got him to loose.
early valakut, with khalni, +chandra for his banslayer. it was total control for valakut.
2-0, 1-1
round 3 was also control
this deck has denial, DoJ's, some wall and some counterspell, and some removals,
but i had no creature, so his removals was dead cards. early khalni and more than 2 valakut in play sealed the game.
2-0, 2-1
round 4 was white wheeni deck.
he played with 2 lands in hand. fortunately i had my lavaball trap.
got early valakut, and khalni, but valakut still wont be online till few more mountains. i had to crack my khalni for the hardcast lavaball. and i did manage to hardcast it, destroyed his 2 plains, fortunately he had brave the elements to protect his creatures. but i still have removals on my hand. after casting my removals, he scooped. BTW im already down to 7 lives at that point.
game 2 he managed to counter my harrow, slowing me down. then beat me.
game 3 i manage to pull early valakut, removal, then khalni. win for me
2-1, 3-1
round 5 was with a control
i had many misplays here, and i learned a lot here.
1. cast instants one by one, as to not be countered by double negative (i've done this twice in this game, double lightning bolt,)
2. with heavy counter deck, remove harrow. side in all creatures.
3. think for answer to a sphinx (5/5 shroud)
4. dont play withour a forest.
5. play smart, and always play like your winning.
the community is good, but the prize structure is not that good compared to my hometown FNM(dasma)
entrance fee 150php, we had i think 22 players, i placed 8th but the prize was cut at 6th, 3 - 2 - 1 - 1 -1 -1. edit infairness they run 16k. not bad for a 150 entrance
before this tourney i already used the valakut control but it only had one chandra, no lavaball.
i played it in dasma i went 1 - 3 with it.
most of my matchups was aggro (3 losses - RDW, big green, another-i-forgot-aggro deck), the win is from a control deck. with my chandra always appearing on the board.
thinking of adding one more chandra on the main(remove earthquake to the side) and another lavaball trap on the side.
#note: early khalni drops will increase the chance you win. you could actully hardcast lavaball trap with khalni turn 5
SB is my tech
i play once a month, depends on my wife.
the deck should be better if i'm not the pilot.
13x mountains
3x forest
4x terramorphic expance
4x valakut
24 lands
4 harrow
4 rampant growth
4 expedition map
4 Khalni Heart Expedition
4 lightning bolt
4 burst lightning
3 lavaball trap
3 volcanic fallout
2 chandra nalaar
2 pyroclasm
2earthquake
36 spells
i played this deck last wednesday on philcoa, and it ran fine. it was a deck they did not expect.
round 1 was against vamps.
he took game 1, he got 3 bloodghast on the board. i manage to sweep it but, alas a land dropped. GG for me.
2nd game, i got an early online valakut, with khalni and few more mountains, he lost this game.
3rd game, i got an early valakut, but he manages to mindsludge me, and finished me with his malakir.
1-2, 0-1
round 2 was a control deck.
he just was not ready for my deck, i think the suprise got him to loose.
early valakut, with khalni, +chandra for his banslayer. it was total control for valakut.
2-0, 1-1
round 3 was also control
this deck has denial, DoJ's, some wall and some counterspell, and some removals,
but i had no creature, so his removals was dead cards. early khalni and more than 2 valakut in play sealed the game.
2-0, 2-1
round 4 was white wheeni deck.
he played with 2 lands in hand. fortunately i had my lavaball trap.
got early valakut, and khalni, but valakut still wont be online till few more mountains. i had to crack my khalni for the hardcast lavaball. and i did manage to hardcast it, destroyed his 2 plains, fortunately he had brave the elements to protect his creatures. but i still have removals on my hand. after casting my removals, he scooped. BTW im already down to 7 lives at that point.
game 2 he managed to counter my harrow, slowing me down. then beat me.
game 3 i manage to pull early valakut, removal, then khalni. win for me
2-1, 3-1
round 5 was with a control
i had many misplays here, and i learned a lot here.
1. cast instants one by one, as to not be countered by double negative (i've done this twice in this game, double lightning bolt,)
2. with heavy counter deck, remove harrow. side in all creatures.
3. think for answer to a sphinx (5/5 shroud)
4. dont play withour a forest.
5. play smart, and always play like your winning.
the community is good, but the prize structure is not that good compared to my hometown FNM(dasma)
entrance fee 150php, we had i think 22 players, i placed 8th but the prize was cut at 6th, 3 - 2 - 1 - 1 -1 -1. edit infairness they run 16k. not bad for a 150 entrance
before this tourney i already used the valakut control but it only had one chandra, no lavaball.
i played it in dasma i went 1 - 3 with it.
most of my matchups was aggro (3 losses - RDW, big green, another-i-forgot-aggro deck), the win is from a control deck. with my chandra always appearing on the board.
thinking of adding one more chandra on the main(remove earthquake to the side) and another lavaball trap on the side.
#note: early khalni drops will increase the chance you win. you could actully hardcast lavaball trap with khalni turn 5
SB is my tech
Huwebes, Setyembre 17, 2009
testimony
taken from an email
Attorney:
Will you please state your age?
Little Old Lady:
I am 86 years old.
Defense Attorney:
Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened the night of April 1st?
Little Old Lady:
There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front porch on a warm spring evening,
when a young man comes creeping up on the porch and sat down beside me.
Defense Attorney:
Did you know him?
Little Old Lady:
No, but he sure was friendly.
Defense Attorney:
What happened after he sat down?
Little Old Lady:
He started to rub my thigh.
Defense Attorney:
Did you stop him?
Little Old Lady:
No, I didn't stop him.
Defense Attorney:
Why not?
Little Old Lady:
It felt good. Nobody had done that since my Albert died some 30 years ago.
Defense Attorney:
What happened next?
Little Old Lady:
He began to rub my breasts.
Defense Attorney:
Did you stop him then?
Little Old Lady:
No, I did not stop him.
Defense Attorney:
Why not?
Little Old Lady:
His rubbing made me feel all alive and excited. I haven't felt that good in years!
Defense Attorney:
What happened next?
Little Old Lady:
Well, by then, I was feeling so 'spicy' that I just laid down and told him
'Take me, young man. Take me now!'
Defense Attorney:
Did he take you?
Little Old Lady:
Hell, no! He just yelled, 'April Fool!' And that's when I shot him, the little bastard
Question: panu ko 2 uubusin?
Attorney:
Will you please state your age?
Little Old Lady:
I am 86 years old.
Defense Attorney:
Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened the night of April 1st?
Little Old Lady:
There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front porch on a warm spring evening,
when a young man comes creeping up on the porch and sat down beside me.
Defense Attorney:
Did you know him?
Little Old Lady:
No, but he sure was friendly.
Defense Attorney:
What happened after he sat down?
Little Old Lady:
He started to rub my thigh.
Defense Attorney:
Did you stop him?
Little Old Lady:
No, I didn't stop him.
Defense Attorney:
Why not?
Little Old Lady:
It felt good. Nobody had done that since my Albert died some 30 years ago.
Defense Attorney:
What happened next?
Little Old Lady:
He began to rub my breasts.
Defense Attorney:
Did you stop him then?
Little Old Lady:
No, I did not stop him.
Defense Attorney:
Why not?
Little Old Lady:
His rubbing made me feel all alive and excited. I haven't felt that good in years!
Defense Attorney:
What happened next?
Little Old Lady:
Well, by then, I was feeling so 'spicy' that I just laid down and told him
'Take me, young man. Take me now!'
Defense Attorney:
Did he take you?
Little Old Lady:
Hell, no! He just yelled, 'April Fool!' And that's when I shot him, the little bastard
Question: panu ko 2 uubusin?
Biyernes, Setyembre 11, 2009
MIST batch 1999 reunion
i tried to post this earlier, about last 2 days ago, but there is this error that keeps me from doing so.
anyways i'll just post this in plain text, no more pix, no more vids.
We had our highschool reunion last sept 5, Markina Institute of Science and Technology batch 1999, and it was a BLAST ,the best you could ever have. party all night.... and it was really something to remember, too bad some of my batchmates missed it, anyways the attendance was great, i think half of my batch came.
Congrats to all the coordinators, sana magkaroon ulet after 10 yrs lolzzzzz.
links to some pix.
reunion pix by hajji
reunion pix by hajji p2
anyways i'll just post this in plain text, no more pix, no more vids.
We had our highschool reunion last sept 5, Markina Institute of Science and Technology batch 1999, and it was a BLAST ,the best you could ever have. party all night.... and it was really something to remember, too bad some of my batchmates missed it, anyways the attendance was great, i think half of my batch came.
Congrats to all the coordinators, sana magkaroon ulet after 10 yrs lolzzzzz.
links to some pix.
reunion pix by hajji
reunion pix by hajji p2
Huwebes, Setyembre 10, 2009
The debate
taken from an email
An Atheist Professor of Philosophy speaks to his Class on the Problem Science has with GOD, The ALMIGHTY.
He asks one of his New Christian Student to stand and . . .
Professor : You are a Christian, aren't you, son ?
Student : Yes, sir.
Professor : So you Believe in GOD ?
Student : Absolutely, sir.
Professor : Is GOD Good ?
Student : Sure.
Professor : Is GOD ALL - POWERFUL ?
Student : Yes.
Professor : My Brother died of Cancer even though he Prayed to GOD to Heal him.
Most of us would attempt to Help Others who are ill.
But GOD didn't.
How is this GOD Good then ? Hmm ?
( Student is silent )
Professor : You can't answer, can you ?
Let's start again, Young Fella.
Is GOD Good ?
Student : Yes.
Professor : Is Satan good ?
Student : No.
Professor : Where does Satan come from ?
Student : From . . . GOD . . .
Professor : That's right.
Tell me son, is there evil in this World ?
Student : Yes.
Professor : Evil is everywhere, isn't it ?
And GOD did make Everything. Correct ?
Student : Yes.
Professor : So who created evil ?
(Student does not answer)
Professor : Is there Sickness ? Immorality ? Hatred ? Ugliness ?
All these terrible things exist in the World, don't they ?
Student : Yes, sir.
Professor : So, who Created them ?
( Student has no answer )
Professor : Science says you have 5 Senses you use to Identify and Observe the World around you.
Tell me, son . . . Have you ever Seen GOD ?
Student : No, sir.
Professor : Tell us if you have ever Heard your < style="font-family:Tahoma;font-size:85%;color:red;">GOD ?
Student : No , sir.
Professor : Have you ever Felt your GOD, Tasted your GOD, Smelt your GOD ?
&nbs! p; Have you ever had any Sensory Perception of GOD for that matter ?
Student : No, sir. I'm afraid I haven't.
Professor : Yet you still Believe in HIM ?
Student : Yes.
Professor : According to Empirical, Testable, Demonstrable Protocol, Science says your GOD doesn't exist.
What do you say to that, son ?
Student : Nothing. I only have my Faith.
Professor : Yes. Faith. And that is the Problem Science has.
Student : Professor, is there such a thing as Heat ?
Professor : Yes.
Student : And is there such a thing as Cold ?
Professor : Yes.
Student : No sir. There isn't.
( The Lecture Theatre becomes very quiet with this turn of events )
Student : Sir, you can have Lots of Heat, even More Heat, Superheat, Mega Heat, White Heat,
a Little Heat or No Heat.
But we don't have anything called Cold.
We can hit 458 Degrees below Zero which is No Heat, but we can't go any further after that.
There is no such thing as Cold.
Cold is only a Word we use to describe the Absence of Heat.
We cannot Measure Cold.
Heat is Energy.
Cold is Not the Opposite of Heat, sir, just the Absence of it.
( There is Pin - Drop Silence in the Lecture Theatre )
Student : What about Darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as Darkness ?
Professor : Yes. What is Night if there isn't Darkness ?
Student : You're wrong again, sir.
Darkness is the Absence of Something.
You can have Low Light, Normal Light , Bright Light, Flashing Light . . .
! ; But if you have No Light Constantly, you have Nothing and it's called Darkness, isn't it ?
In reality, Darkness isn't.
If it is, were you would be able to make Darkness Darker, wouldn't you ?
Professor : So what is the point you are making, Young Man ?
Student : Sir, my point is your Philosophical Premise is Flawed.
Professor : Flawed ? Can you explain how ?
Student : Sir, you are working on the Premise of Duality.
You argue there is Life and then there is Death, a Good GOD and a Bad GOD.
You are viewing the Concept of GOD as something finite, something we can measure.
Sir, Science can't even explain a Thought.
It uses Electricity and Magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one.
To view Death as the Opposite of Life is to be ignorant of the fact that
Death cannot exist as a Substantive Thing.
Death is Not the Opposite of Life : just the Absence of it.
Now tell me, Professor , do you Teach yourStudents that they Evolved from a Monkey ?
Professor : If you are referring to the Natural Evolutionary Process, yes, of course, I do.
Student : Have you ever observed Evolution with your own eyes, sir ?
( The Professor shakes his head with a Smile, beginning to realize where the Argument is going )
Student : Since no one has ever observed the Process of Evolution at work and
cannot even prove that this Process is an On - Going Endeavor,
are you not Teaching your Opinion, sir ?
Are you not a Scientist but a Preacher ?
( The Class is in Uproar )
Student : Is there anyone in the Class who has ever Seen the Professor's Brain ?
( The Class breaks out into Laughter )
Student : Is there anyone here who has ever Heard the Professor's Brain, Felt it, Touched or Smelt it ? . . .
No one appears to have done so.
So, according to the Established Rules of Empirical, Stable, Demonstrable Protocol, Science says that
you have No Brain, sir.
&n! bsp; With all due respect, sir, how do we then Trust your Lectures, sir ?
( The Room is Silent. The Professor stares at the Student, his face unfathomable )
Professor : I guess you'll have to take them on Faith, son.
Student : That is it sir . . .
the Link between Man & GOD is FAITH.
That is all that Keeps Things Moving & Alive.
An Atheist Professor of Philosophy speaks to his Class on the Problem Science has with GOD, The ALMIGHTY.
He asks one of his New Christian Student to stand and . . .
Professor : You are a Christian, aren't you, son ?
Student : Yes, sir.
Professor : So you Believe in GOD ?
Student : Absolutely, sir.
Professor : Is GOD Good ?
Student : Sure.
Professor : Is GOD ALL - POWERFUL ?
Student : Yes.
Professor : My Brother died of Cancer even though he Prayed to GOD to Heal him.
Most of us would attempt to Help Others who are ill.
But GOD didn't.
How is this GOD Good then ? Hmm ?
( Student is silent )
Professor : You can't answer, can you ?
Let's start again, Young Fella.
Is GOD Good ?
Student : Yes.
Professor : Is Satan good ?
Student : No.
Professor : Where does Satan come from ?
Student : From . . . GOD . . .
Professor : That's right.
Tell me son, is there evil in this World ?
Student : Yes.
Professor : Evil is everywhere, isn't it ?
And GOD did make Everything. Correct ?
Student : Yes.
Professor : So who created evil ?
(Student does not answer)
Professor : Is there Sickness ? Immorality ? Hatred ? Ugliness ?
All these terrible things exist in the World, don't they ?
Student : Yes, sir.
Professor : So, who Created them ?
( Student has no answer )
Professor : Science says you have 5 Senses you use to Identify and Observe the World around you.
Tell me, son . . . Have you ever Seen GOD ?
Student : No, sir.
Professor : Tell us if you have ever Heard your < style="font-family:Tahoma;font-size:85%;color:red;">GOD ?
Student : No , sir.
Professor : Have you ever Felt your GOD, Tasted your GOD, Smelt your GOD ?
&nbs! p; Have you ever had any Sensory Perception of GOD for that matter ?
Student : No, sir. I'm afraid I haven't.
Professor : Yet you still Believe in HIM ?
Student : Yes.
Professor : According to Empirical, Testable, Demonstrable Protocol, Science says your GOD doesn't exist.
What do you say to that, son ?
Student : Nothing. I only have my Faith.
Professor : Yes. Faith. And that is the Problem Science has.
Student : Professor, is there such a thing as Heat ?
Professor : Yes.
Student : And is there such a thing as Cold ?
Professor : Yes.
Student : No sir. There isn't.
( The Lecture Theatre becomes very quiet with this turn of events )
Student : Sir, you can have Lots of Heat, even More Heat, Superheat, Mega Heat, White Heat,
a Little Heat or No Heat.
But we don't have anything called Cold.
We can hit 458 Degrees below Zero which is No Heat, but we can't go any further after that.
There is no such thing as Cold.
Cold is only a Word we use to describe the Absence of Heat.
We cannot Measure Cold.
Heat is Energy.
Cold is Not the Opposite of Heat, sir, just the Absence of it.
( There is Pin - Drop Silence in the Lecture Theatre )
Student : What about Darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as Darkness ?
Professor : Yes. What is Night if there isn't Darkness ?
Student : You're wrong again, sir.
Darkness is the Absence of Something.
You can have Low Light, Normal Light , Bright Light, Flashing Light . . .
! ; But if you have No Light Constantly, you have Nothing and it's called Darkness, isn't it ?
In reality, Darkness isn't.
If it is, were you would be able to make Darkness Darker, wouldn't you ?
Professor : So what is the point you are making, Young Man ?
Student : Sir, my point is your Philosophical Premise is Flawed.
Professor : Flawed ? Can you explain how ?
Student : Sir, you are working on the Premise of Duality.
You argue there is Life and then there is Death, a Good GOD and a Bad GOD.
You are viewing the Concept of GOD as something finite, something we can measure.
Sir, Science can't even explain a Thought.
It uses Electricity and Magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one.
To view Death as the Opposite of Life is to be ignorant of the fact that
Death cannot exist as a Substantive Thing.
Death is Not the Opposite of Life : just the Absence of it.
Now tell me, Professor , do you Teach yourStudents that they Evolved from a Monkey ?
Professor : If you are referring to the Natural Evolutionary Process, yes, of course, I do.
Student : Have you ever observed Evolution with your own eyes, sir ?
( The Professor shakes his head with a Smile, beginning to realize where the Argument is going )
Student : Since no one has ever observed the Process of Evolution at work and
cannot even prove that this Process is an On - Going Endeavor,
are you not Teaching your Opinion, sir ?
Are you not a Scientist but a Preacher ?
( The Class is in Uproar )
Student : Is there anyone in the Class who has ever Seen the Professor's Brain ?
( The Class breaks out into Laughter )
Student : Is there anyone here who has ever Heard the Professor's Brain, Felt it, Touched or Smelt it ? . . .
No one appears to have done so.
So, according to the Established Rules of Empirical, Stable, Demonstrable Protocol, Science says that
you have No Brain, sir.
&n! bsp; With all due respect, sir, how do we then Trust your Lectures, sir ?
( The Room is Silent. The Professor stares at the Student, his face unfathomable )
Professor : I guess you'll have to take them on Faith, son.
Student : That is it sir . . .
the Link between Man & GOD is FAITH.
That is all that Keeps Things Moving & Alive.
Miyerkules, Setyembre 9, 2009
ANO ANG DAPAT GAWIN KUNG TINATAMAD KANG MAGTRABAHO ?
taken from an email
Sa buhay empleyado merong dalawang pagpipilian kung tinatamad kang magtrabaho.
A. Una ay umabsent.
1. Kapag umiikot na kaagad sa katawan mo ang katamaran pagkagising pa lang sa umaga ay mag-isip ka na kaagad ng palusot kung bakit ka aabsent. Paalala: dapat ay memoryado mo ang mga dahilang nagamit mo na dati (tip: gumawa ng isang logbook) ng sa gayon ay hindi ka parang sirang plakang nag-uulit lang lagi ng rason ng di pagpasok. Alalahanin na tuso din ang mga bossing.
2. Kapag nakaisip ka na ng magandang dahilan ay agad mag-text o tumawag sa bossing mo, the earlier the better. Kung ayaw mo ng madaming tanong e mag-text ka at kung nais mo namang tumawag ay siguraduhin mong magaling kang umarte kagaya ng kung ikaw ay kunwaring me sakit ay umubo ka ng paunti-unti habang kinakausap ang bossing mo.
3. Matapos mag-text/tumawag ay bumalik sa higaan at magplano ka na ng gusto mong gawin sa buong araw. Malaking posibilidad na magtutulog ka lang buong araw. Sya nga pala, kapag tumawag ang opisina sa kalagitnaan ng araw, laging tandaan ang rasong ginamit (consistent ka dapat), maaari namang i-off mo na lang ang phone mo para hindi ka maistorbo buong araw.
BABALA: Siguraduhing regular ka na sa kumpanyang pinagtratrabahuhan kung ikaw ay mag-aabsent..
B. Pangalawa ay pumasok
Eto ang dapat gawin ng mga empleyado kapag tinatamad magtrabaho pero ayaw umabsent. Ang mga taong ito ay nuknukan ng kapal ng mukha. Ang mga sumusunod na instructions ay napakasimple pero effective. Meron ding oras na nakatakda, magsisismula ng alas ocho ng umaga at magtatapos ng alas singko ng hapon..
1. Pumasok ng sakto sa oras. Huwag kang male-late at huwag ka din namang excited masyado. 8:00
2. Pagdating mo sa opisina ay ilapag mo lang kaagad ang gamit mo sa lamesa at magtungo kaagad sa pantry. Magtimpla ng kape o kung anuman ang iniinom mo pag umaga. Habang nasa loob ay makipag-usap sa mga tao doon, patagalin mo ang usapan (tip: pag-usapan ang mga headline ngayong araw o mga nangyari kahapon sa loob ng opisina). Kung walang tao sa pantry ay mag-yaya ka ng kasama bago pa man pumasok doon. 8:00-8:30
3. Matapos sa pantry ay magtungo na sa lamesa mo dala-dala pa din ang kape, ito ay para hindi ka antukin buong araw. Buksan ang computer. Matapos nito ay buksan ang mailbox mo. Basahin ang mga email…mapabago man o luma. Buksan lahat ng pedeng buksang attachments, makakabuti ito sa pagpapatagal ng oras. O kaya naman ay mag-email ka sa mga kakilala mong matagal mo ng di nakakamusta. Kapag di ka pa nakuntento ay gawing chat ang email (ito ay sa kadahilanang banned na ang halos lahat ng messengers sa mga kompanya…pati google talk di pinalagpas, mga hayop na IT yan). Pano? Mag-email ka sa kakilala mong alam mong merong access sa internet sa mga oras na yon tapos antayin ang reply…wholla! Instant chat session. Sya nga pala, habang ginagawa ang mga nasa taas ay huwag makakalimot inumin ang kape..lalamig ito. 8:30-9:30
3. Matapos ang makabuluhag paggamit ng computer ay magdala ng mga papel-papel at magtungo sa kung saan mo man nais. Mas maganda kung mukha kang aborido hawak ang mga props mo habang papaalis ng lamesa, ito ay para sabihin ng bossing mo sampu ng kasamahan mo sa trabaho na busy ka lagi. Magtungo sa ibang department na me kakilala at makipag-usap ng kung anu-ano. 9:30-10:00
4. Tignan mo nga naman. Alas dies na! Break time na ulit! Pagkatapos mag-lamyerda sa ibang department ay magtungo ulit sa puwesto at ibaba ang mga scratch paper na props. Dalhin ang tasa sa pantry at magtimpla ulit ng panibagong kape, libre ang kape kaya magtimpla ka lang ng magtimpla. Magtungo sa labas kung ikaw ay nag-yoyosi kung di naman ay manatili sa pantry at makipag-usap ka na lang sa mga tao doon. 10:00-10:15
5. Pagkatapos ng break ay bumalik sa lamesa at humarap sa computer (huwag ng magdala ng kape sa lamesa…tama na ang nainom mo, sisikmurain ka na sa sobrang gahaman). Tapos ka na sa mga emails mo, ngayon naman ay mag-internet ka na lang ng kung anik-anik. Pero bago mag-internet ay magbukas ka muna ng office document kahit wala kang balak gawin ang mga ito, makakatulong ang documentong ito mamya. Tapos ay mag-internet ka na. Paalala: dapat ay alerto ka sa mga tao sa paligid mo, kapag alam mong me padating pindutin ang ALT at TAB ng sabay. Ito ay para makapunta sa office document na binuksan mo kanina. Kung mabagal ang iyong reflexes ay dapat mabilis ka sa paggamit ng mouse para ma-click mo agad sa taskbar ung documentong nasabi. Kapag na-master mo na ang technique na ito ay di na mapapansin ng bossing mo na nag-iinternet ka lang sa mga oras na ito. 10:15-12:00
6. Tama na muna ang computer. Lunch break na! Alam mo na ang dapat gawin. 12:00-1:00
7. Pagkatapos kumain ay gawin ulit ang #5. Habang gingawa ito ay maglabas ulit ng mga scratch papers na para bang me hinahanap. Tandaan na dapat seryoso ang mukha mo habang gingawa ang mga ito (tip: ikunot ang noo para makakuha ng mukhang seryoso). 1:00-3:00
8. Break time na ulit. Ang bilis nga naman ng oras. Hala..punta na ulit sa pantry. Maaari ka na ulit mag-kape at makipag-chikahan. 3:00-3:15
9. Bumalik sa lamesa at guluhin ito sa pamamagitan ng paglabas ng sandamakmak na mga papel. Tapos ay gawin ulit and #5. Tignan ang oras sa computer mo. Kung 4:30 na ay simulan mo ng ayusin ang ginulong lamesa. Mag-ayos ayos ka na din ng sarili. Kung kasing kapal ng adobe ang mukha mo ay magtungo ka ulit sa pantry para mag-kape (tandaan na dapat me kasama sa pantry) o kaya naman ay gawin ang #3. Matapos ang lahat ng ito ay umuwi ka na, para mo ng awa…wala ka na ngang silbi ay nangdadamay ka pa ng iba sa katamaran mo. 3:15-5:00
BABALA: Wag mong ipapabasa ito sa bossing mo kung ayaw mong mawalan ka ng trabaho.
Sa buhay empleyado merong dalawang pagpipilian kung tinatamad kang magtrabaho.
A. Una ay umabsent.
1. Kapag umiikot na kaagad sa katawan mo ang katamaran pagkagising pa lang sa umaga ay mag-isip ka na kaagad ng palusot kung bakit ka aabsent. Paalala: dapat ay memoryado mo ang mga dahilang nagamit mo na dati (tip: gumawa ng isang logbook) ng sa gayon ay hindi ka parang sirang plakang nag-uulit lang lagi ng rason ng di pagpasok. Alalahanin na tuso din ang mga bossing.
2. Kapag nakaisip ka na ng magandang dahilan ay agad mag-text o tumawag sa bossing mo, the earlier the better. Kung ayaw mo ng madaming tanong e mag-text ka at kung nais mo namang tumawag ay siguraduhin mong magaling kang umarte kagaya ng kung ikaw ay kunwaring me sakit ay umubo ka ng paunti-unti habang kinakausap ang bossing mo.
3. Matapos mag-text/tumawag ay bumalik sa higaan at magplano ka na ng gusto mong gawin sa buong araw. Malaking posibilidad na magtutulog ka lang buong araw. Sya nga pala, kapag tumawag ang opisina sa kalagitnaan ng araw, laging tandaan ang rasong ginamit (consistent ka dapat), maaari namang i-off mo na lang ang phone mo para hindi ka maistorbo buong araw.
BABALA: Siguraduhing regular ka na sa kumpanyang pinagtratrabahuhan kung ikaw ay mag-aabsent..
B. Pangalawa ay pumasok
Eto ang dapat gawin ng mga empleyado kapag tinatamad magtrabaho pero ayaw umabsent. Ang mga taong ito ay nuknukan ng kapal ng mukha. Ang mga sumusunod na instructions ay napakasimple pero effective. Meron ding oras na nakatakda, magsisismula ng alas ocho ng umaga at magtatapos ng alas singko ng hapon..
1. Pumasok ng sakto sa oras. Huwag kang male-late at huwag ka din namang excited masyado. 8:00
2. Pagdating mo sa opisina ay ilapag mo lang kaagad ang gamit mo sa lamesa at magtungo kaagad sa pantry. Magtimpla ng kape o kung anuman ang iniinom mo pag umaga. Habang nasa loob ay makipag-usap sa mga tao doon, patagalin mo ang usapan (tip: pag-usapan ang mga headline ngayong araw o mga nangyari kahapon sa loob ng opisina). Kung walang tao sa pantry ay mag-yaya ka ng kasama bago pa man pumasok doon. 8:00-8:30
3. Matapos sa pantry ay magtungo na sa lamesa mo dala-dala pa din ang kape, ito ay para hindi ka antukin buong araw. Buksan ang computer. Matapos nito ay buksan ang mailbox mo. Basahin ang mga email…mapabago man o luma. Buksan lahat ng pedeng buksang attachments, makakabuti ito sa pagpapatagal ng oras. O kaya naman ay mag-email ka sa mga kakilala mong matagal mo ng di nakakamusta. Kapag di ka pa nakuntento ay gawing chat ang email (ito ay sa kadahilanang banned na ang halos lahat ng messengers sa mga kompanya…pati google talk di pinalagpas, mga hayop na IT yan). Pano? Mag-email ka sa kakilala mong alam mong merong access sa internet sa mga oras na yon tapos antayin ang reply…wholla! Instant chat session. Sya nga pala, habang ginagawa ang mga nasa taas ay huwag makakalimot inumin ang kape..lalamig ito. 8:30-9:30
3. Matapos ang makabuluhag paggamit ng computer ay magdala ng mga papel-papel at magtungo sa kung saan mo man nais. Mas maganda kung mukha kang aborido hawak ang mga props mo habang papaalis ng lamesa, ito ay para sabihin ng bossing mo sampu ng kasamahan mo sa trabaho na busy ka lagi. Magtungo sa ibang department na me kakilala at makipag-usap ng kung anu-ano. 9:30-10:00
4. Tignan mo nga naman. Alas dies na! Break time na ulit! Pagkatapos mag-lamyerda sa ibang department ay magtungo ulit sa puwesto at ibaba ang mga scratch paper na props. Dalhin ang tasa sa pantry at magtimpla ulit ng panibagong kape, libre ang kape kaya magtimpla ka lang ng magtimpla. Magtungo sa labas kung ikaw ay nag-yoyosi kung di naman ay manatili sa pantry at makipag-usap ka na lang sa mga tao doon. 10:00-10:15
5. Pagkatapos ng break ay bumalik sa lamesa at humarap sa computer (huwag ng magdala ng kape sa lamesa…tama na ang nainom mo, sisikmurain ka na sa sobrang gahaman). Tapos ka na sa mga emails mo, ngayon naman ay mag-internet ka na lang ng kung anik-anik. Pero bago mag-internet ay magbukas ka muna ng office document kahit wala kang balak gawin ang mga ito, makakatulong ang documentong ito mamya. Tapos ay mag-internet ka na. Paalala: dapat ay alerto ka sa mga tao sa paligid mo, kapag alam mong me padating pindutin ang ALT at TAB ng sabay. Ito ay para makapunta sa office document na binuksan mo kanina. Kung mabagal ang iyong reflexes ay dapat mabilis ka sa paggamit ng mouse para ma-click mo agad sa taskbar ung documentong nasabi. Kapag na-master mo na ang technique na ito ay di na mapapansin ng bossing mo na nag-iinternet ka lang sa mga oras na ito. 10:15-12:00
6. Tama na muna ang computer. Lunch break na! Alam mo na ang dapat gawin. 12:00-1:00
7. Pagkatapos kumain ay gawin ulit ang #5. Habang gingawa ito ay maglabas ulit ng mga scratch papers na para bang me hinahanap. Tandaan na dapat seryoso ang mukha mo habang gingawa ang mga ito (tip: ikunot ang noo para makakuha ng mukhang seryoso). 1:00-3:00
8. Break time na ulit. Ang bilis nga naman ng oras. Hala..punta na ulit sa pantry. Maaari ka na ulit mag-kape at makipag-chikahan. 3:00-3:15
9. Bumalik sa lamesa at guluhin ito sa pamamagitan ng paglabas ng sandamakmak na mga papel. Tapos ay gawin ulit and #5. Tignan ang oras sa computer mo. Kung 4:30 na ay simulan mo ng ayusin ang ginulong lamesa. Mag-ayos ayos ka na din ng sarili. Kung kasing kapal ng adobe ang mukha mo ay magtungo ka ulit sa pantry para mag-kape (tandaan na dapat me kasama sa pantry) o kaya naman ay gawin ang #3. Matapos ang lahat ng ito ay umuwi ka na, para mo ng awa…wala ka na ngang silbi ay nangdadamay ka pa ng iba sa katamaran mo. 3:15-5:00
BABALA: Wag mong ipapabasa ito sa bossing mo kung ayaw mong mawalan ka ng trabaho.
Linggo, Agosto 30, 2009
Sabado, Agosto 15, 2009
Guide for 93% Baby Boy or Girl
Just follow the table below.
The Womans Age at the left, then at the right is the gender of the baby you want. just make the baby on that month, and 93% of will be the gender on the table.
To make a Boy : Woman on top, full moon also helps.
The Womans Age at the left, then at the right is the gender of the baby you want. just make the baby on that month, and 93% of will be the gender on the table.
To make a Boy : Woman on top, full moon also helps.
Martes, Agosto 11, 2009
Biyernes, Agosto 7, 2009
understanding men and women ~ read and learn
taken from an email
UNDERSTANDING WOMEN
A Woman's Vocabulary, Keywords and Meanings (as taken from an interview with a woman)
FINE
This is the word we use at the end of any argument in which we feel we are right, but need to shut you up. NEVER use 'Fine' to describe how a woman looks. This will cause you to have one of those
arguments.
FIVE MINUTES
This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five
minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so I feel that it's an even trade.
NOTHING
This means something and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing"
usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with the word "Fine".
GO AHEAD (with raised eyebrows)
This is a dare. One that will result in a woman
getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine".
GO AHEAD (normal eyebrows)
This means "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care". You will get a raised eyebrow "Go Ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in
about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.
LOUD SIGH
This is not actually a word, but is still often a
verbal statement very misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing".
SOFT SIGH
Again, not a word, but a verbal statement. "Soft
Sighs" are one of the few things that some men actually understand. She is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe and she will stay
content.
OH
This word followed by any statement is trouble.
Example; "Oh, let me get that". Or, "Oh, I talked to him about what you were doing last night". If she says "Oh" before a statement, run, do not walk, to the nearest exit. She will tell you that she is "Fine"
when she is done tossing your clothes out the window, but do not expect her to talk to you for at least 2 days. "Oh" as the lead-in to a sentence usually signifies that you are caught in a lie. Do not try to lie more to get out of it, or you will get raised eyebrows and a "Go ahead," followed by acts so unspeakable that I can't bring myself to write about them.
THAT'S OKAY
This is one of the most dangerous statements that a
woman can say to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before visiting on you major retribution and tribulations for what ever it is that you have done. "That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and used in conjunction with a raised eyebrow "Go Ahead". At some point in the near future when she has plotted and planned, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble.
PLEASE DO
This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is
giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance to tell the
truth, so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's
Okay".
THANKS
A woman is thanking you. Do not faint, just say you're welcome.
THANKS A LOT
This is much different than "Thanks". A woman will
say, "Thanks A Lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have hurt her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh". Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud
Sigh", as she will only tell you "Nothing".
UNDERSTANDING MEN
"IT'S A GUY THING"
Translated: "There is no rational thought pattern
connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical."
"CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?"
Translated: "Why isn't it already on the table?"
"UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR"
Translated: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned
response.
"IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN"
Translated: "I have no idea how it works."
"I WAS LISTENING TO YOU. IT'S JUST THAT I HAVE THINGS ON MY MIND."
Translated: "That girl standing on the corner is a
real babe."
"TAKE A BREAK HONEY, YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD."
Translated: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum
cleaner."
"THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR."
Translated: "Are you still talking?"
"YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS."
Translated: "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop', the address of the first girl I ever kissed, and the vehicle identification numbers of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot our anniversary."
"I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT YOU, AND GOT YOU THESE ROSES."
Translated: "The girl selling them on the corner
was a real babe."
"OH, DON'T FUSS - I JUST CUT MYSELF, IT'S NO BIG DEAL."
Translated: "I have actually severed a limb, but
will bleed to death before I admit that I'm hurt."
"I CAN'T FIND IT."
Translated: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."
"WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?"
Translated: "What did you catch me at?"
"I HEARD YOU."
Translated: "I haven't the foggiest clue what you
just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next three days yelling at me."
"YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE."
Translated: "I am used to the way you yell at me,
and realize it could be worse."
"YOU LOOK TERRIFIC."
Translated: "Oh, please don't try on one more
outfit, I'm starving."
"I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE."
Translated: "No one will ever see us alive again."
UNDERSTANDING WOMEN
A Woman's Vocabulary, Keywords and Meanings (as taken from an interview with a woman)
FINE
This is the word we use at the end of any argument in which we feel we are right, but need to shut you up. NEVER use 'Fine' to describe how a woman looks. This will cause you to have one of those
arguments.
FIVE MINUTES
This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five
minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so I feel that it's an even trade.
NOTHING
This means something and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing"
usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with the word "Fine".
GO AHEAD (with raised eyebrows)
This is a dare. One that will result in a woman
getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine".
GO AHEAD (normal eyebrows)
This means "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care". You will get a raised eyebrow "Go Ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in
about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.
LOUD SIGH
This is not actually a word, but is still often a
verbal statement very misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing".
SOFT SIGH
Again, not a word, but a verbal statement. "Soft
Sighs" are one of the few things that some men actually understand. She is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe and she will stay
content.
OH
This word followed by any statement is trouble.
Example; "Oh, let me get that". Or, "Oh, I talked to him about what you were doing last night". If she says "Oh" before a statement, run, do not walk, to the nearest exit. She will tell you that she is "Fine"
when she is done tossing your clothes out the window, but do not expect her to talk to you for at least 2 days. "Oh" as the lead-in to a sentence usually signifies that you are caught in a lie. Do not try to lie more to get out of it, or you will get raised eyebrows and a "Go ahead," followed by acts so unspeakable that I can't bring myself to write about them.
THAT'S OKAY
This is one of the most dangerous statements that a
woman can say to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before visiting on you major retribution and tribulations for what ever it is that you have done. "That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and used in conjunction with a raised eyebrow "Go Ahead". At some point in the near future when she has plotted and planned, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble.
PLEASE DO
This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is
giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance to tell the
truth, so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's
Okay".
THANKS
A woman is thanking you. Do not faint, just say you're welcome.
THANKS A LOT
This is much different than "Thanks". A woman will
say, "Thanks A Lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have hurt her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh". Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud
Sigh", as she will only tell you "Nothing".
UNDERSTANDING MEN
"IT'S A GUY THING"
Translated: "There is no rational thought pattern
connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical."
"CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?"
Translated: "Why isn't it already on the table?"
"UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR"
Translated: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned
response.
"IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN"
Translated: "I have no idea how it works."
"I WAS LISTENING TO YOU. IT'S JUST THAT I HAVE THINGS ON MY MIND."
Translated: "That girl standing on the corner is a
real babe."
"TAKE A BREAK HONEY, YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD."
Translated: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum
cleaner."
"THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR."
Translated: "Are you still talking?"
"YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS."
Translated: "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop', the address of the first girl I ever kissed, and the vehicle identification numbers of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot our anniversary."
"I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT YOU, AND GOT YOU THESE ROSES."
Translated: "The girl selling them on the corner
was a real babe."
"OH, DON'T FUSS - I JUST CUT MYSELF, IT'S NO BIG DEAL."
Translated: "I have actually severed a limb, but
will bleed to death before I admit that I'm hurt."
"I CAN'T FIND IT."
Translated: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."
"WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?"
Translated: "What did you catch me at?"
"I HEARD YOU."
Translated: "I haven't the foggiest clue what you
just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next three days yelling at me."
"YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE."
Translated: "I am used to the way you yell at me,
and realize it could be worse."
"YOU LOOK TERRIFIC."
Translated: "Oh, please don't try on one more
outfit, I'm starving."
"I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE."
Translated: "No one will ever see us alive again."
Martes, Agosto 4, 2009
RESEARCH FINDINGS ON MEN AND WOMEN
edit : taken from Nuetralgrounds.net/forums
source need an account to log in
1. Tests have shown that women rate 3% higher in
general intelligence than men, although their brain
size is smaller.
2. Women are walking radar detectors, that is why men
have difficulty lying to women. Their brains have the
ability to integrate and decipher verbal,visual and
other signals of body language. Hence women will
always be safe when faking an orgasm.
3. Women want lots of sex with the men they love. Men
just want lots of sex.
4. When men flirt, they will lower their pitch of
voice. Women will raise theirs.
5. Women talk and think aloud while men do them
silently. As a result, men think women talk too much
and are nags.
6. Women talk about their problems as a way of
relieving stress. They want to be heard, not fixed by
being offered advice and solutions
7. Speech and words are not a specific brain skill for
men. They find it hard to express themselves. That's
why they often choose greeting cards with plenty of
words inside. That way, there's less space for them to
write.
8. Women leave men, not because they are unhappy with
what he can provide,but because they are emotionally
unfulfilled
9. Women use an average of 20,000 communication words,
sounds, and gestures a day. Men only use about 7,000.
10. So if a woman is talking to you a lot, she likes
you. But if she's not talking, you're in trouble.
11. Men are more thick-skinned than women. Literally.
Which explains why women have more wrinkles than men.
Boys lose their sensitivity to touch by the time they
reach puberty. So where does all that sensitivity go?
It all goes to just one area.
12. If a woman is unhappy in her relationship, she
can't concentrate on her work. If a man is unhappy at
work, he can't focus on his relationship.
13. Men can only do one thing at a time. When they
stop their car to read a street directory, they have
to turn down the radio. Women's brain are configured
for multi-tasking performance. They can talk on the
phone, watch the TV and cook at the same time.
14. Most men get a brain hemorrhage after 20 minutes
of clothes shopping.
15. When it comes to sex, women need a reason; men
need a place.
16. 15% to 20% of men have feminized brains. About 10%
of women have masculinised brains. So there are more
gays than lesbians in the world.
17. Most women prefer sex with the lights off because
they can't bear to see a man enjoying himself. Men
like the lights on - so they can get the woman's name
right
source need an account to log in
1. Tests have shown that women rate 3% higher in
general intelligence than men, although their brain
size is smaller.
2. Women are walking radar detectors, that is why men
have difficulty lying to women. Their brains have the
ability to integrate and decipher verbal,visual and
other signals of body language. Hence women will
always be safe when faking an orgasm.
3. Women want lots of sex with the men they love. Men
just want lots of sex.
4. When men flirt, they will lower their pitch of
voice. Women will raise theirs.
5. Women talk and think aloud while men do them
silently. As a result, men think women talk too much
and are nags.
6. Women talk about their problems as a way of
relieving stress. They want to be heard, not fixed by
being offered advice and solutions
7. Speech and words are not a specific brain skill for
men. They find it hard to express themselves. That's
why they often choose greeting cards with plenty of
words inside. That way, there's less space for them to
write.
8. Women leave men, not because they are unhappy with
what he can provide,but because they are emotionally
unfulfilled
9. Women use an average of 20,000 communication words,
sounds, and gestures a day. Men only use about 7,000.
10. So if a woman is talking to you a lot, she likes
you. But if she's not talking, you're in trouble.
11. Men are more thick-skinned than women. Literally.
Which explains why women have more wrinkles than men.
Boys lose their sensitivity to touch by the time they
reach puberty. So where does all that sensitivity go?
It all goes to just one area.
12. If a woman is unhappy in her relationship, she
can't concentrate on her work. If a man is unhappy at
work, he can't focus on his relationship.
13. Men can only do one thing at a time. When they
stop their car to read a street directory, they have
to turn down the radio. Women's brain are configured
for multi-tasking performance. They can talk on the
phone, watch the TV and cook at the same time.
14. Most men get a brain hemorrhage after 20 minutes
of clothes shopping.
15. When it comes to sex, women need a reason; men
need a place.
16. 15% to 20% of men have feminized brains. About 10%
of women have masculinised brains. So there are more
gays than lesbians in the world.
17. Most women prefer sex with the lights off because
they can't bear to see a man enjoying himself. Men
like the lights on - so they can get the woman's name
right
Miyerkules, Hulyo 29, 2009
jokes ulet tayo
from NG boards
eto para masaya naman:
•Minsan naglalakad aq, ngiisa. Lumingon ako sa kanan, wala akong nakita. Lumingon ako sa kaliwa, wala rin akong nkita. Kaya ayun. tumawid n ako!
•PEDRO: Miss, pabili nga ng bolpen. MISS: Sorry po sir, wala po kaming bolpen. [Inis na lumabas si Pedro sa tindahan.] PEDRO: My God! Penshoppe walang bolpen!tsk.tsk
•KUBA: Tnukso nila akong kuba! Makapagaral nga ng karate. 5months later. FRIEND: Gling mong magkarate ah. Tinatwag kp rin ba nilang kuba? KUBA: Hindi na, ninja turtle na!
•BITOY: dagul, bakit ang pandak mo? DAGUL: kasi bata pa lang ako ulila na ko. BITOY: Ano kaugnayan nun sa pgiging pandak mo? DAGUL: sira pala ulo mo! Wala nga nagpalaki skin!
eto para masaya naman:
•Minsan naglalakad aq, ngiisa. Lumingon ako sa kanan, wala akong nakita. Lumingon ako sa kaliwa, wala rin akong nkita. Kaya ayun. tumawid n ako!
•PEDRO: Miss, pabili nga ng bolpen. MISS: Sorry po sir, wala po kaming bolpen. [Inis na lumabas si Pedro sa tindahan.] PEDRO: My God! Penshoppe walang bolpen!tsk.tsk
•KUBA: Tnukso nila akong kuba! Makapagaral nga ng karate. 5months later. FRIEND: Gling mong magkarate ah. Tinatwag kp rin ba nilang kuba? KUBA: Hindi na, ninja turtle na!
•BITOY: dagul, bakit ang pandak mo? DAGUL: kasi bata pa lang ako ulila na ko. BITOY: Ano kaugnayan nun sa pgiging pandak mo? DAGUL: sira pala ulo mo! Wala nga nagpalaki skin!
Sabado, Abril 25, 2009
Manipesto ng Tunay Na Lalake
taken from zeichen of NG forums:
Manipesto ng Tunay Na Lalake
1. Ang tunay na lalake ay di natutulog.
2. Ang tunay na lalake ay di nagte-text-back, maliban na lang kung papasahan ng load. Gayunpaman, laging malabo ang kanyang mga sagot.
3. Ang tunay na lalake ay laging may extra rice.
4. Ang tunay na lalake ay hindi vegetarian.
5. Ang tunay na lalake ay walang abs.
6. Ang tunay na lalake ay hindi sumasayaw.
7. Ang tunay na lalake ay umaamin ng pagkakamali sa kapwa tunay na lalake.
8. Ang tunay na lalake ay laging may tae sa brief.
9. Ang tunay na lalake ay di naghuhugas ng pinagkainan o nagliligpit ng kanyang mga gamit dahil may babaeng gagawa noon para sa kanya. Mas lalong nagiging tunay ang pagkalalake kung di niya kilala o di niya maalala ang pangalan ng babae.
10. Ang tunay na lalake ay di nagsisimba.
Manipesto ng Tunay Na Lalake
1. Ang tunay na lalake ay di natutulog.
2. Ang tunay na lalake ay di nagte-text-back, maliban na lang kung papasahan ng load. Gayunpaman, laging malabo ang kanyang mga sagot.
3. Ang tunay na lalake ay laging may extra rice.
4. Ang tunay na lalake ay hindi vegetarian.
5. Ang tunay na lalake ay walang abs.
6. Ang tunay na lalake ay hindi sumasayaw.
7. Ang tunay na lalake ay umaamin ng pagkakamali sa kapwa tunay na lalake.
8. Ang tunay na lalake ay laging may tae sa brief.
9. Ang tunay na lalake ay di naghuhugas ng pinagkainan o nagliligpit ng kanyang mga gamit dahil may babaeng gagawa noon para sa kanya. Mas lalong nagiging tunay ang pagkalalake kung di niya kilala o di niya maalala ang pangalan ng babae.
10. Ang tunay na lalake ay di nagsisimba.
Etiquette sa inuman- basahin at matuto
taken from a random mail:
Etiquette sa inuman- basahin at matuto
Sa inuman:
1. Pag abot ng baso- 3 minutes ang pinakamatagal na pag hintay. Mag bigay ng konsiderasyon sa mga ibang umiinom- sundin ang gintong kasabihan
"Di bale ng magtagal sa puke @ at suso wag lang sa baso"
2. Pag tapos tumagay - ibalik sa tanggero ang baso- tinagayan ka na, baka naman pedeng ibalik mo sa kanya. hindi ka prinsipe.
3. Ang chaser ay panawid lasa- hindi panawid uhaw. dun ka sa gripo lumaklak kung kakatapos mo lang mag gym.
4. Iwasan ang magtapon ng alak. binabayaran yan. Di ka pa nga ata nag ambag...aaksayahin mo pa..tigas ng mukha mo tlga ever..hehe..
5. Siguraduhing magaambag ka sa inuman- tigas mo naman kung makiki-inom ka ng libre- pede ka lang malibre kung nilibre ka nila o niyaya ka kahit sabi mong wala kang pera
Sa Pulutan:
1. Una sa lahat, ang pulutan ay panawid pait, hindi panawid gutom- kumain ka sa inyo kung gutom ka. wag kang kung-fu kid!
2. Pag ginagamit ang tinidor, huwag mong kakamayin- para kang walang pinag aralan.
3. Pagkain ng isda, hindi binabaliktad- sabi nila sa mga marino galing ang istilo na to para hindi tumaob ang barko.
4. Huwag mag reklamo kung ano ang nakahain. tandaan hindi to fiesta, inuman to.
5. Ang tinik,buto at mga parteng hindi makakain ilagay sa tabi- huwag kang baboy.
6. Kung hindi ka tanggero, guitarista at birthday boy/girl- pede kang magluto at tumulong sa iba pang gawain sa inuman. hindi ka pinanganak na senyorito, kung pakiramdam mo hari ka- dun ka sa kaharian mo maginom
Asal sa Mesa :
1. Kung isa lang ang tinidor, huwag mag inarte- Koboy dapat. inuman to- hindi sosyalan,
2. Sa kuwentuhan, alam na namin na kayo ang pinaka-siga, maraming chicks, mayaman, maporma at pinaka magaling sa lahat ng bagay. Huwag mo ng ikuwento.
3. Pag bisita ka, makitawa sa mga joke nila- makihalubilo, aalukin ka nila ng ilang beses pero huwag mong abusuhin- hindi ka sanggol.
4. Huwag rin masyadong pasikat- ok lang magkuwento pag dayo ka- huwag ka lang kupal.
5. Huwag na huwag mambabara kung bisita ka. Pede lang mambara kung kupal ang binara.
6. Irespeto ang opinyon ng iba, tulad ng pagrespeto mo sayo.
7. Pag hindi na kaya- pwedeng pumas- huwag maging pasikat - kupal ang dating mo non.
8. Magpatawa ka para masaya- kung mang aasar ka sa tropa sigraduhin nakakatawa, hindi panlalait. Konsiderasyon sa bisita.
Ang pagiging siga ay hindi masaya sa inuman.
9. Huwag makipag sabayan. Buraot ang alagaing lasing.
10. Bigyan ng pugay ang nagpainom at may birthday - wag kang agaw eksena.
11. Goodtimes lagi.
After ng Inuman:
1. Ugaliing tumulong magligpit.
2. Kung di na kaya humiga sa isang tabi
3. Kung di tumutulong magligpit - huwag makulit.
4. Huwag kalimutan magpaalam sa nag painom at mga kainuman.
5. Kung aalis sa kalagitnaan ng inuman, gawing habit ang magiwan ng pangambag.
Suka Tips:
1. Pag naduduwal na, kumuha ng matamis para may pangsabay sa bibig pag naglalaway na.
2. Huwag magyoyosi pagnasusuka na, iba ang epekto ng usok sa tyan pag nakainom.
3. Pag nakakaramdam na ng suka, tumayo agad at dumiretso sa pinakamalapit na sukahan- (banyo, inodoro.)
4. Magmumog lagi pagkatapos sumuka- kadiri bibig mo brad.
5. At kung plano pang bumalik sa mesa- siguraduhing malinis ang itsura. Para di ka itaboy.
Tanggero Tips:
1. Bilang punong naatasan sa pag pasa ng tagay, siguraduhing kumpleto ka ng gamit tulad ng:
tabo ng tubig (pangbanlaw ng baso pag beer ang iniinom) pambukas, at lighter.
2. Ang obligasyon mo ay ipasa ang tagay sa lahat ng manginginom, mga nagambag - alukin ang lahat ng bisita.
Sa Mga Manginginom:
1.Pakunsuwelo sa mga nagpainom at tanggero, alalayan sila tulad ng pag replenish ng yelo, pulutan, pagbili ng pulutan at pagpapalit ng music kung walang naatasang dj.
2. Panatilihing masaya ang inuman, makinig sa sasabihin ng iba kung drama, at mag saya para makalimot sa problema-
Mabuhay ang mga manginginom! !! Inuman na!!!
Etiquette sa inuman- basahin at matuto
Sa inuman:
1. Pag abot ng baso- 3 minutes ang pinakamatagal na pag hintay. Mag bigay ng konsiderasyon sa mga ibang umiinom- sundin ang gintong kasabihan
"Di bale ng magtagal sa puke @ at suso wag lang sa baso"
2. Pag tapos tumagay - ibalik sa tanggero ang baso- tinagayan ka na, baka naman pedeng ibalik mo sa kanya. hindi ka prinsipe.
3. Ang chaser ay panawid lasa- hindi panawid uhaw. dun ka sa gripo lumaklak kung kakatapos mo lang mag gym.
4. Iwasan ang magtapon ng alak. binabayaran yan. Di ka pa nga ata nag ambag...aaksayahin mo pa..tigas ng mukha mo tlga ever..hehe..
5. Siguraduhing magaambag ka sa inuman- tigas mo naman kung makiki-inom ka ng libre- pede ka lang malibre kung nilibre ka nila o niyaya ka kahit sabi mong wala kang pera
Sa Pulutan:
1. Una sa lahat, ang pulutan ay panawid pait, hindi panawid gutom- kumain ka sa inyo kung gutom ka. wag kang kung-fu kid!
2. Pag ginagamit ang tinidor, huwag mong kakamayin- para kang walang pinag aralan.
3. Pagkain ng isda, hindi binabaliktad- sabi nila sa mga marino galing ang istilo na to para hindi tumaob ang barko.
4. Huwag mag reklamo kung ano ang nakahain. tandaan hindi to fiesta, inuman to.
5. Ang tinik,buto at mga parteng hindi makakain ilagay sa tabi- huwag kang baboy.
6. Kung hindi ka tanggero, guitarista at birthday boy/girl- pede kang magluto at tumulong sa iba pang gawain sa inuman. hindi ka pinanganak na senyorito, kung pakiramdam mo hari ka- dun ka sa kaharian mo maginom
Asal sa Mesa :
1. Kung isa lang ang tinidor, huwag mag inarte- Koboy dapat. inuman to- hindi sosyalan,
2. Sa kuwentuhan, alam na namin na kayo ang pinaka-siga, maraming chicks, mayaman, maporma at pinaka magaling sa lahat ng bagay. Huwag mo ng ikuwento.
3. Pag bisita ka, makitawa sa mga joke nila- makihalubilo, aalukin ka nila ng ilang beses pero huwag mong abusuhin- hindi ka sanggol.
4. Huwag rin masyadong pasikat- ok lang magkuwento pag dayo ka- huwag ka lang kupal.
5. Huwag na huwag mambabara kung bisita ka. Pede lang mambara kung kupal ang binara.
6. Irespeto ang opinyon ng iba, tulad ng pagrespeto mo sayo.
7. Pag hindi na kaya- pwedeng pumas- huwag maging pasikat - kupal ang dating mo non.
8. Magpatawa ka para masaya- kung mang aasar ka sa tropa sigraduhin nakakatawa, hindi panlalait. Konsiderasyon sa bisita.
Ang pagiging siga ay hindi masaya sa inuman.
9. Huwag makipag sabayan. Buraot ang alagaing lasing.
10. Bigyan ng pugay ang nagpainom at may birthday - wag kang agaw eksena.
11. Goodtimes lagi.
After ng Inuman:
1. Ugaliing tumulong magligpit.
2. Kung di na kaya humiga sa isang tabi
3. Kung di tumutulong magligpit - huwag makulit.
4. Huwag kalimutan magpaalam sa nag painom at mga kainuman.
5. Kung aalis sa kalagitnaan ng inuman, gawing habit ang magiwan ng pangambag.
Suka Tips:
1. Pag naduduwal na, kumuha ng matamis para may pangsabay sa bibig pag naglalaway na.
2. Huwag magyoyosi pagnasusuka na, iba ang epekto ng usok sa tyan pag nakainom.
3. Pag nakakaramdam na ng suka, tumayo agad at dumiretso sa pinakamalapit na sukahan- (banyo, inodoro.)
4. Magmumog lagi pagkatapos sumuka- kadiri bibig mo brad.
5. At kung plano pang bumalik sa mesa- siguraduhing malinis ang itsura. Para di ka itaboy.
Tanggero Tips:
1. Bilang punong naatasan sa pag pasa ng tagay, siguraduhing kumpleto ka ng gamit tulad ng:
tabo ng tubig (pangbanlaw ng baso pag beer ang iniinom) pambukas, at lighter.
2. Ang obligasyon mo ay ipasa ang tagay sa lahat ng manginginom, mga nagambag - alukin ang lahat ng bisita.
Sa Mga Manginginom:
1.Pakunsuwelo sa mga nagpainom at tanggero, alalayan sila tulad ng pag replenish ng yelo, pulutan, pagbili ng pulutan at pagpapalit ng music kung walang naatasang dj.
2. Panatilihing masaya ang inuman, makinig sa sasabihin ng iba kung drama, at mag saya para makalimot sa problema-
Mabuhay ang mga manginginom! !! Inuman na!!!
Martes, Pebrero 24, 2009
Sunday standard tourney : 02/22/2009
I'll start blogging on my every tourney i'll join, or tourney i would be organizing.
This will be my very first blog about such.
Round 1 - JD Matias
game 1 - he mulled to 5, eventually lost to my deck.
game 2 - i got stuck with 2 lands then drawing on my 4th or 5th turn the land that i needed, badly it was a ghitu encampment, o well his brodmate and muldrifter made its way to win the game.
game 3 - he got no creature on the board, i got an early FoD on 4/4 on the board.
it was a 2-1 win for me.
i never get to see his deck, but i think it was control. i saw couple of brodmate dragons, muldrifter, plumenveil, criptic command, broken ambitions.
1 - 0
Now of to Round 2
Round 2 - Jonathan Tabalina
He was using a 5 color control deck, sleeved with a toploader. woaaahhhh!!!
Game 1 - i get controlled early, using his counter spells. cryptic there, broken here. then it was already GG.
Game 2 - i sideboarded 3 guttural response, and a everlasting torment.
got my creatures out early, but eventually controlled me, darn cryptic command.
i lost this one.
1 -1
Round 3 - Erwin
He was using a merfolk deck
game 1 - i got 4 mountains on board, but i am holding 3 blightning, and a shriekmaw. i have casted a creature, but he did PTE it. i forgot to put swamp on my deck. ^_^
lesson learned here : put a basic land on a multicolor deck.
game 2 - he Sideboarded an BFT, WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!
anyways remove volcanic fallout, put in Infest when white is present.
damn PTE and that white memory lapse.
damn wake thrasher.
lost here again
1 - 2
Round 4 - Victor
my hated game of the tourney, he is using a landy deck.
damn first game i got 8 land out, all wiped out.
second game another land wiped out.
another terible lost.
1 - 3
now i decided to drop!!!!!!!!!!!
what a tourney....
i now start to hate my red black deck!!!!!!!!!!
till next time!!!!!
This will be my very first blog about such.
Round 1 - JD Matias
game 1 - he mulled to 5, eventually lost to my deck.
game 2 - i got stuck with 2 lands then drawing on my 4th or 5th turn the land that i needed, badly it was a ghitu encampment, o well his brodmate and muldrifter made its way to win the game.
game 3 - he got no creature on the board, i got an early FoD on 4/4 on the board.
it was a 2-1 win for me.
i never get to see his deck, but i think it was control. i saw couple of brodmate dragons, muldrifter, plumenveil, criptic command, broken ambitions.
1 - 0
Now of to Round 2
Round 2 - Jonathan Tabalina
He was using a 5 color control deck, sleeved with a toploader. woaaahhhh!!!
Game 1 - i get controlled early, using his counter spells. cryptic there, broken here. then it was already GG.
Game 2 - i sideboarded 3 guttural response, and a everlasting torment.
got my creatures out early, but eventually controlled me, darn cryptic command.
i lost this one.
1 -1
Round 3 - Erwin
He was using a merfolk deck
game 1 - i got 4 mountains on board, but i am holding 3 blightning, and a shriekmaw. i have casted a creature, but he did PTE it. i forgot to put swamp on my deck. ^_^
lesson learned here : put a basic land on a multicolor deck.
game 2 - he Sideboarded an BFT, WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!
anyways remove volcanic fallout, put in Infest when white is present.
damn PTE and that white memory lapse.
damn wake thrasher.
lost here again
1 - 2
Round 4 - Victor
my hated game of the tourney, he is using a landy deck.
damn first game i got 8 land out, all wiped out.
second game another land wiped out.
another terible lost.
1 - 3
now i decided to drop!!!!!!!!!!!
what a tourney....
i now start to hate my red black deck!!!!!!!!!!
till next time!!!!!
Biyernes, Pebrero 20, 2009
Shutdown : recession taking its toil
from feb 22-28 shutdown na naman kami. 1rst for this year. but meron pang shutdown coming again this april. para naman sa holyweek.....
hayyysss!!!!!!!!!!!!!
recession nga naman!!!!!
sabi nga ng CEO namin " there seems to be a 'defeatist' sense that 'survival' is the key objective; that growth is no longer possible since there are no new 'killer' applications”
eto malupet " Unfortunately, these actions will require additional job losses at *** in the coming months"
kayo musta naman nga trabaho nyo dyan???
hayyysss!!!!!!!!!!!!!
recession nga naman!!!!!
sabi nga ng CEO namin " there seems to be a 'defeatist' sense that 'survival' is the key objective; that growth is no longer possible since there are no new 'killer' applications”
eto malupet " Unfortunately, these actions will require additional job losses at *** in the coming months"
kayo musta naman nga trabaho nyo dyan???
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